*NOTE*

*NOTE TO ALL WHO KNOW ME*

when i cry, it's doesn't necessarily mean i am upset (unless it's online, then when i cry i am actually upset) but most of the time in real life when i cry, i am just intimidated by you, not scared as such, but, more scared of the unknown, what's going to happen, what are they going to say, so please, please, don't think you've upset me, cause 75% of the time, i'm just intimidated, and crying is my way of dealing with it, normally, i'm fine again in 10 minutes, people say that i'm abrupt, & jumpy, sure, i am when i'm happy, but i'm just shy first, cause people don't understand me, so please don't think that i'm upset when i cry, cause it's not always the case, i don't upset easily (unless it's family) normally, it takes alot to upset me, believe it or not.

Neville, you didn't upset me, i just got intimidated by the unknown, not knowing what's going to happen, not knowing what you were going to say, i wasn't upset, i promise, i have a cold & my throats been 65% for ages now, about the beginning of winter, so i can't really project my voice as much, you didn't upset me, i hate people seeing me cry, i hate it, that's why i run, it happens every time, you didn't upset me.

Just one more thing, i hate people seeing me cry, cause i hate people thinking i'm a weakling, that's why i get away when i cry, like today, i ran to the toilets & wouldn't come out till i had washed my face, even though i'm on edge afterwards normally & get scared when i go back out, cause i'm intimidated easily, my boyfriend intimidated me at first & was worried when i went all quiet, cause i'm not used to attention, i'm not used to it, cause all i get is bad attention normally, which i hate, that's what makes me who i am, no one can change that

thanks for understanding everyone
God Bless
manda4889